It now costs more to amuse a child that it cost to educate his father

• The only one who listens to both sides of the argument is the woman in the next flat.
• The popular girl is the one who has been weighed in the balance and found wanton.
• If you want to get a youthful figure, ask a woman her age.
• Our unabashed dictionary defines both bigamy and marriage as having one wife too many.
• Getting married is like going to the restaurant with friend. You order what you want then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had taken that.
• A woman with a past attracts men who hope that history will repeat itself.
• Passionate picnickers should bear in mind that some girls are like flowers - they grow wild in woods.
• Making love to a woman too many times is like scratching a place that doesn't itch anymore.
• Some girls marry older men for their money and spend the rest of their life for a little change.
• Money cant buy you love but it can put you in a strong bargaining position.
• Generations of great thinkers have dreamed of a money less society somewhere in the future. As far as my family is concerned we are far ahead of our time.
• There are far more important things in life than money. The trouble is they all cost money.
• Even books on how to be happy without money cost more than i can afford.
• When it comes to giving some people stop at nothing.
• Doctors tell you if you eat slowly you eat less. Anybody raised in a large family will also tell you the same.
• If you need a heart transplant wait for a heart of a banker - it hasn't been used much.
• A girl with a rich father does not need a beauty parlour.
• The coating of civilization is so thin it often comes off with a little alchohol..
• People are generally like tea bags - they do not know their strength until they get into hot water.
• Nowadays many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
• The mink in the closet is sometimes responsible for the wolf at the door.
• Medically speaking, the difference between an itch and am allergy is about two hundred rupees.
• How wise are the commandments; Oh lord! Each one of them applies to some body or other I know.
• The husbands of the ten best dressed women are never on the list of the ten best dressed men.
• It is true that nothing is certain but death and taxes. Sometimes, I wish they came in that order.
• It is better to have loved and lost than to have loved and won.
• Marriage is like a box of chocolates, you will have to buy the whole box to get one little piece.
• Beauty is more dangerous than wine, it intoxicates the holder and the beholder.
• Saddam Hussein also challenged President Bush to a debate - The butcher of Baghdad vs the butcher of the English language.
• All men make mistakes but married men find out about them sooner.